This post is one that is very dear to my heart, not only because I share one of the most intimate moments of my life, but it also marks my 100th blog post! I hope this brings tingly, warm fuzzies...
We celebrated Zenchai’s 3rd birthday last week. To honour his bubbly spirit I would like to share our ecstatic birthing tango. I wholeheartedly believe my yoga history, healthy diet, strong resolve of mind and heart and supple body contributed to us experiencing a birthing paradise.
For many moons I have been deeply connected to the natural process of giving birth. This passion stems from a time in my life when I did not have any children nor was I contemplating having them, but rather I was completely awe-struck with the female body’s capabilities. Most people gape in astonishment at the women’s ability to squeeze a watermelon through a lemon! I was no exception.
I read everything I could get my hands on regarding childbirth, breastfeeding and natural fertility. On many occasions I have flirted with the idea of becoming a midwife. And who knows? Maybe one day I’ll cross paths with an old village midwife and she’ll extend an offer to apprentice me. I can dream can’t I?!
When I did become pregnant I knew exactly how I wanted to have my birth – at home, birthing pool, candles lit, aromatherapy scenting the air, homeopathy kit in hand and midwives that I had formed a loving relationship with. True enough Zenchai’s birth was not far off the mark.
As my two due dates (one based on the standard 28-day menstrual cycle and the second one based on my longer 32-36-day menstrual cycle) whizzed by, Claude and I were left wondering if our babe was ever going to make an entrance into this world. We had silly bets about when Zenchai (we didn’t know if we were having a boy or girl – I didn’t have any ultrasound scans) would come, like when all three of our azalea bushes were in tandem bloom. We also tried all the usual coaxing methods – over-ripened pineapple, hot curries, vigorous walks, sperm on the cervix (sex), homeopathy, aromatherapy, reflexology (my therapist told me my feet didn’t even feel like a pregnant woman’s!) But Zenchai had his own agenda and still does today!
Two weeks or three later, depending on how you look at the dates, I woke-up to use the loo very early in the morning. To my surprise I had a show. Since this was way beyond Zenchai’s due date I knew that it was going to be ‘the day’. I told Claude and he drowsily commented that we should phone the midwives. I thought it was too early, so just climbed back into bed.
We both returned to sleep. As I swung from sleepiness to wakefulness, I noticed waves of sensations running through my body. I woke Claude again just before 11am to ask if he would call the midwives, just to give them a heads-up. I crawled out of bed and went straight to the kitchen. For whatever reason, I was determined to make a lemon cake. I began getting the ingredients out; I even went so far as chopping a few lemons. But I abandoned my cake attempt when I realized how ridiculous the idea was. I couldn’t concentrate on the lemons when I had something way more profound happening in my body!
Instead, I sat on our Swissball, looking out into the garden, focusing on my breathing. I am not sure if it was my heavy breathing that woke Claude from his sleep, but he came down to check on me only to find me in full-blown labour.
He decided to call the midwives to tell them the birth was becoming imminent (my waves were every three minutes). I decided to escape to the stairs. I began rocking and making very cow-like noises. At one point I broke down and wept on the steps. I just sobbed in Claude’s arms, babbling something about how we were really going to become parents. Then I was sick (obviously I was in transition!) After some comfort, I went back to my own world. Claude was madly rushing to fill the birth pool. I crawled up the stairs to the toilet. It felt like a natural place for me to go. Sitting on the toilet was always comforting when I had severe menstrual cramps in the past. (Claude said to celebrate Zenchai’s 3rd birthday I should have just sat on the toilet for three hours meditating! You didn’t know that I am married to a comedian did you?!)
Around 12:30pm, our first midwife, Louise, arrived. I was still holed up in the toilet, had just been sick again, but was totally oblivious to the world around me. Claude said it looked similar to seeing someone possessed; my head was rolling and I was breathing loud and incessantly. As I remember, it was if I had left my body and some other force had taken over. It was like I released myself to Mother Nature and totally allowed my body to flow. I don’t in fact recall thinking. There was NEVER a moment when I thought I couldn’t do it, that I needed pain relief or that I was in pain. I felt the intensity of what was happening, but was too far into the meditative-trance state to actually feel the physicality of the birth process.
Our second midwife, Heather, arrived around 3pm, just as I was feeling the urge to push. Picture four adults cramped into a tiny toilet (about the size of a small closet) preparing for a baby to be born – a tin of sardines comes to mind.
I don’t consciously remember pushing. My body just pushed; it knew what to do without me having to urge it. Claude and Louise (luckily, she is tiny!) were crouched beneath me while I was on the toilet. Both midwives thought it would be a good idea to put a towel between the toilet and the seat as Zenchai was coming quickly. While Heather lovingly supported me in very awkward standing position so Louise could secure the towel, Zenchai shot out of me like a rocket! Claude, with the quick assistance of Louise, received Zenchai and handed him to me. At 3:59pm on May 21, 2006, Zenchai was born – without intervention or drugs - all 8lbs and 21 inches of him
When I first held him I was overwhelmed – not only by him but by what had just happened. The intense but speedy birth left me in a fuzzy place, although that could have been attributed to the huge cocktail of hormones I had coursing through my body. There is nothing at all in this world comparable to the post-birth hormone high.
I was so utterly intoxicated by the magical little being I had carried in my body for nearly 10 months and birthed so blissfully. I had known all along he was a boy.
I may not have used the birthing pool or any of the other frilly things, but Zenchai’s birth couldn’t have been any more brillant. He may have taken his time choosing his arrival date, but when he was ready there was no stopping his miraculous entry into our lives.
Happy 3rd Birthday, My Sweet Boy!!
Pop over to RawMom by clicking here to read about how we jubilated Zenchai's big day. And click here to read the interview I did with one of the most inspirational mamas on the planet!
Smooches xx
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